A couple of things inspired this article:
I feel very confident about my bun making skills.
When I searched “easy fast messy bun” on YouTube for the purposes of sharing a video with someone who I thought could benefit from knowing the secrets of crafting a messy bun, I was aghast to find multiple bun tutorials proffering “easy fast messy bun” in the titles, but clocking in at around 60 minutes.
There is no bun on planet earth or any other unknown planets which should take 60 minutes to create, nor 60 minutes to explain.
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If you know where the hell to put your blush, please don’t read this. It’s not for you. You will laugh and point and be smug, for you are a person who knows where the hell to put your blush. In fact, stop reading and go put some blush on. I’m sure it will look magnificent.
Ok, good. They’re gone. It’s just us now.
As someone who has both struggled with my own blush placement, AND as someone who used to make a living by putting blush on other people, I feel exceptionally qualified to write this article and to be the person to tell you exactly. where. the. fuck. to. put. your. blush.
So, let’s do this. A couple of crucial caveats first.
